I'm working on my backwards walk

Well.... hello :)

I know it's been a while, and I wasn't sure when I'd be back 'here'. But sitting in bed, listening to some lovely music with a piping hot cup of tea, I felt (for the first time in a while) that I wanted to pay my Little Blog Of Horrors a visit. It wouldn't take a detective to notice that I've taken a step back from the virtual world in the past few weeks. I've had a lot of personal things happening in my life, I've had to face up to a few difficult situations, and ultimately make some of the hardest decisions I've made in my entire life.

Some of the searches Google Analytics has shown about me and the blog lately, have been downright mental. If you follow me on twitter, you'll have seen me mention now and again what these searches were. Really laughable, and really pathetic. My life is not a glossy magazine, and nor is it any of the business of the losers who try to GOOGLE 'what happened to ayden millar?' Really, what do you expect to find? An online 'zine about my deeply personal life? It actually baffles me! I know my blog is a personal one, 'lifestyle', or what have you. But in no way does that mean I owe anyone the right to know about my life in its entirety. Especially people who don't have my best interests at heart. If that's what you're here to expect, please leave now. I can't control who reads this (ex's, old friends, people who dislike me, people from school, ghosts from my past - whatever) But if you are one of those people, and you're here reading my blog, then you should really ask yourself why.

At the end of the day, shit happens. Life happens. I hope you'll understand when I say I don't want to go into details. And I hope I can continue to write my blog and share bits and bobs of my life with you all as I try to work my way through the hard times I've faced. I had to get that wee rant out of the way, but it is really overpowered by the amount of lovely folks who have been emailing me over the past few weeks to make sure I was okay. I am okay :) and I have made some really amazing friends through writing this blog. People who are there for me, and some of them I've never even met in person before. I'd never let a few silly google searches, or anon formspring questions trying to invade my privacy ruin that. No haters, internet creeps, or plain dumbass's will take this special wee corner of the internet away from me. No chance in hell.

My life is busier than ever, and it's good to be back ♥


Look how long my hair is growing eh?



Celebrated Max's 1st birthday. This boy is going to break some hearts :)


Showing my Hairaisers extensions a night on the town. They are fab, but more on that soon!


Just some really amazing girl I know ♥


Home made cocktails (aldi branded alcohol ftw)


Wouldn't be a sleepover without Mr Lotso (he still smells like strawberries)


The view from Dominique's beautiful new home.


Cosy pub dinners with my cousin, aunties and my mumma. If I grow up to be half as amazing/inspiring/independent as the woman in my life are, then I will be one content wee lady.

My career has went into complete overdrive lately, with lots of exciting things on the horizon and genuinely not much time to sit on the internet (but I've been trying to keep up to date with my google reader) I do have a quite few fun bloggy related things to post about soon, including a gorgeous facial I got at Zen in Edinburgh, the Raybans I won through the Style Passport competition, and a few other lovely things worth mentioning. But that'll all follow soon. In the meantime, thanks for sticking around. Here's to a new chapter in the Little Blog Of Horrors ♥

Ayden x

73 comments:

  1. It's good to have you back! I hope you're ok, you seem to be, and it's good to see you've been keeping busy and having fun x

    www.blahblahbecky.co.uk

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  2. well done darlin' you're lookin flawless in these pictures xx

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  3. F**k the haters!

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  4. so happy you're back to blog again, I did miss your posts! you're looking beautiful as always baby girl, your hair is looking lush! head up, smile on ♥

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  5. Happy to see you posting again, and hope everything turns out ok for you! :)

    You look gorgeous in the pictures!

    http://lowri-armsaroundamemory.blogspot.com/

    x

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  6. Great to see you back. The way that some people behave in the "blog world" never ceases to shock me... You look gorgeous in these photos. x

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  7. Been missing your posts! Soo happy to see you're doing good and looking fab! You're such a doll and I love that you're not letting the internet creeps get to ya!

    Love love
    x x

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  8. So lovely to see your sweet face again! Hope you've had a good weekend. But I still need to email you back too! I haven't forgotten about you, prom! Your hair is looking so long and decent! Have a great week girl. xx

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  9. I am happy to have you back. I bet it feels brilliant to clear the air and say exactly what you want to disclose and when you want to do it. Glad to see you are surrounding yourself with beautiful people, oh my Max is just the sweetest. Your career life sounds exciting too, can't wait to hear more about it! xx

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  10. good for you darling, good for you- I am very proud! xxxxxxxxxx

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  11. Great to see you back :)

    Looking gorgeous as always!

    Hope you've had a great bank holiday weekend xx

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  12. aww it's good that a lot of people are entering exciting new chapters in their lives! I too hate haters (i did a short post about it on my blog the other day) and hate telling all about my life online (why? it's not their business) but we are the fighters here! :)

    Oh and am loving all your photos, I love your hair extensions!
    Jules @ A Bit of Jules

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  14. You look stunning, hun! So proud of you for dealing with everything, even though I know how hard it all must be. Lovely to have you back! x

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  15. It's really nice to see that you're back! I've missed reading your blog!
    xx
    http://homemadefashionista.blogspot.com/

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  16. It's really nice to see that you're back! I've missed reading your blog!
    xx
    http://homemadefashionista.blogspot.com/

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  17. Bollocks to the people weirdly invading your ever so private (and rightly so) private life! Thats really weird, but kudos for you to remaining true to yourself!!

    Good to see your posts back, I love reading your blog and seeing your pictures! Your extensions look ah-mazing! I've been wanting to try some for a while now but keep chickening out!!

    xxx

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  18. I also go silent on the blogging front when things are difficult for me; personally, I'd rather be silent than 'bear all'. But anyway, it's great to see you posting again! Liz xx

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  19. It's great to see you posting again and well done for not letting those people get to you, or steal this lovely little blog away. You look fantastic and I hope everything is going well for you career wise and as for the hard times, there's always a light at the end :)

    http://leighfreda.blogspot.com/

    xxx

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  20. Look at max's little tshirt, he will be a rock and roll star. Such a cutie!
    Nice to see you back and hope you are feeling fab xx

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  21. I'm so happy to see you back! And I'm even more happy to see you back with that beautiful smile on your face! :)

    Max is absolutely adorable, and you're right, he's going to be a little heart breaker when he grows up! Look at that cute little smile!

    I can't wait for your lovely blog to pop up on my dashboard a little more often now. I've missed you a lot & blogger land just isn't quite the same without you!

    Lots of love
    xoxo

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  22. I'm trying to imagine how pathetic one needs to be to google the personal details of someone else's deeply personal ups and downs? Waste of space.

    So glad to have you back. Keep your pretty wee chin up and throw yourself into your career. Looking forward to reading all about the good little things xxx

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  23. Oh I love that I see you name on my google connect! well written post. Go you!

    Your hair is looking long and you look great!

    Joanne xx

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  24. Nice to see you back again, hope you're okay sweet. I actually missed your posts, think I just like a good old nosy at other peoples lives; and yours always looks so fun :) keep up the photos! And don't forget, whatever hurts you makes you stronger right? :) xx

    http://louisejoyb.blogspot.com/

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  25. Welcome back :) Sometimes I start freaking out with the haters and the exes and everyone in between who sees my blog. I'm glad you're posting again :)

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  26. It's lovely to have you back, I have missed your blog posts! Congrats on all the great career opportunities coming your way, it must be so exciting!

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  27. Its good to see you back and being so positive.
    Screw the haters

    xxx

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  28. YAY nice to see your post on my dashboard again!! :) x

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  29. Good to have you back! I've missed your posts & hope some of those loosers don't get you down :) chin up! x

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  30. ayden! my face lit up when i saw your little post on my dashboard :) i'm so happy your back and the way you addressed everything. your completely right and people that want to know things don't have the right to, and if they are so curious should just ask you instead of searching it up. besides that, i look forward to the new chapter in your blog and more than happy to see that your okay. your extensions btw look awesome ;)
    hope your well girlie1 xx

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  31. Aw, bless. I hope you are okay.

    I really like your blog & am glad you are back x

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  32. I hope you are okay. We all need time sometimes to take a step back from our blogs.

    I really worry about old friends, enemys etc reading my blog, but if they do read it does it really matter? I kinda wish blogging could be a little more private at times but thats part of the package I guess.

    Keep up the hard work Ayden, you have always been a great inspiration on here xxx

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  33. Really glad to see you back (have been lurking around here for a long time, and following you on Twitter since starting that malarkey a couple of months ago) and hope you're okay. Looking lovely in your pics!

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  34. So nice to have an update from you, and glad to hear you are okay. No one has the right to demand personal information from you, so you're right to just ignore it. Gorgeous pictures as always m'dear!! <3

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  35. Yay you're back and looking MORE SMOKIN'HOT than ever before? How did that happen?! MAZIN!

    Massive huggles, I knew you'd come back on here eventually. You're stronger than all that shit. FACT.

    xxx

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  36. You have no idea how happy I am for you, sweetie. I'm so glad things are looking up. You certainly look even more beautiful than before ;) You've always got a friend in me. Yes, I'm right at the other end of the country and I'm merely on the internet but I still want to be here for you cause you're one of the nicest ladies I've come across. Congrats with all your work lady (: I was telling Luke all about your work the other day and he was very impressed I knew such talented ladies :D Hope to speak soon!

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  37. I followed you a few weeks ago after seeing you on SBV's giveaway, so i'm excited you're back as the first post I read said you were havin a little break! i read through a lot of your archives and like your writing style and photos =)

    Chip
    http://chefchipmunk.blogspot.com/

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  38. Take good care of yourself x

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  39. Well, well, well, what do we have here then? My super strong best friend who doesn't owe anyone any explanation :)

    I feel like I have some serious Vulcan eyebrows going on in that picture of us but I love it and you anyway! <3

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  40. I'm so glad you're writing again on this blog, I missed your posts. I saw from twitter you seemed down, so I hope everything is back on track for you.
    I love your hair! And looks like you've been having a fab time recently. Good luck with everything, looking forward to more posts :)

    franky xxxx

    http://snippets-scribbles.blogspot.com/

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  41. So glad to have you back in the blogging world Ayden, missed you lots.
    Glad that things are going ok, you are such a strong and sorted haggis. Love and hugs. xxx

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  42. Nice to see your face again :) x

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  43. As weird as I feel saying it, I've really missed you(r blog)! Really glad everythings good and you've had the time to come back. Looking forward to whatever you feel like posting, I personally think it's your honesty that makes your blog so lovely to read, don't be concerned with what a few anons are bitching about. Those negative nancys are far out weighed by people, who just think you're pretty amazing and inspiring. Just remember we decided to follow you, so you're obviously doing yhings right x

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  44. Ayden!! So glad to see you back, I was going to e-mail you today, it's so weird that we've both posted our back to blogging posts on the same day too! xxx

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  45. Glad to see you back darling, I've missed you! x

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  46. So glad to see you back and being as positive as ever Ayden! I still can't get over the fact that people were/are googling those sorts of things but well done for keeping your head high throughout everything! Those cocktails look great too... gotta love Amaretto! Did you make Alabama Slammers?! xx

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  47. So glad you're back and you're looking awesome! x

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  48. Only been reading your blog a few weeks but i love it,and i hope everything turns out for the best:)

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  49. To be honest aiden, most of us are just glad to have you back and to see you writing again! You write incredibly well and it's lovely to see you're back! Sure missed your posts... hope all is well and best wishes for a lovely week.

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  50. I don't really know what most of that up top was about but I presume it's not really aimed at your loyal fans ;) Hope you're ok sweets, you sound strong and you know there's a lot of love for you on here. Really glad to hear work is kicking off for you too, if nothing else for severe distraction from bad things. ♥ Claire @ Jazzpad

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  51. you look great in that jumpsuit/dress whatever it is!

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  52. I'm glad to see you back, and hopefully feeling a bit better. I've been logging onto your blog hoping to see you back again for a while! Hope everything's ok. Love :)

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  53. hey Aydan, I know you probably don't know me because I don't comment so so often, but I just wanted you to know that you're awesome and little blog of horrors is awesome, and don't worry about them haters, just you whip your hair at them :P haha! Hugs, and hopefully the shit goes away as quickly as possible.

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  54. lovely lovely lovely lovely :) good to see you back xxx

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  55. <3 Lovely to see a new post!
    Aww Max is such a little cutie, loving him in the Zep tee! Looking gorgeous as always - that dress is lush!

    I'm more of a Lidl alcohol fan myself ;) xo

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  56. i love your hair!! it looks so good at that length!

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  57. Great to have you back :).

    Max is such a cutie - 1 already, wow!

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  58. I personally love reading your blog and hope you do continue to keep it on. Some things you touched on during this post, i can identify with and it's really nice to see that yes you may not have had the the best time lately but you have a positive outlook despite that. And a positive outlook can conquer a lot :)

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  59. IM SO GLAD YOUR BACK. I'M ONLY 2 WEEKS LATE TO THE PARTY Y'KNOW.

    :s love ya x

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  60. Glad to see you're back! But those people are absolutely crazy to google you like that! Your life is no one else's business! I'm sure those people wouldn't want others nosing around in their lives.

    Your little brother is growing up so fast! He's such a cutie!

    Keep up the good work girlie, and know that even though some people are a bit weird about your blog/life, that you do have a lot of admiration from all your followers! :))

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  61. the extensions look great, love your dress and lotso! x

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  62. I just found your blog today, and I am so excited to follow. I'm moving to Glasgow on Wednesday [actually, I don't get into Glasgow until Thursday, but I leave Chicago on Wednesday] and I am super stoked!

    Lauren @ See Parrot

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  63. so glad to see your back!! and take care of yourself, perfect excuse to eat more sugar eh?! (im getting my nurse head on now)
    Loving all the pics, love how youve thrown yourself into the blogsphere and made so many friends, thats what its all about after all :)
    hope things turn around for you soon!
    xx

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  64. You really are very pretty Ayden, so bleeding jealous!
    Glad you're back and feeling better :)

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